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People I meet along my life’s journey often asked me what determines success, what determines wealth.

Firstly, I define wealth not only in terms of money and balance sheet assets, but predominantly by who you are, your ability to love and forgive, and your kindness towards those less fortunate.

 

 

Buy experiences, not things. Myanmar 2015 © Ellany Lea

 

Acronym for Wealth

I often use this acronym to describe true wealth:

  • Wonderment… the sense of awe and magic that you see through your eyes and feel in your heart
  • Enlightenment… the clarity of purpose and evolution of consciousness that your mind and spirit carry
  • Acceptance… the ability to gracefully let go of what is not meant for us
  • Liberty… the freedom to be you, to live life your way and to be master of your own time
  • Trust… the knowing that there is something greater than human beings in this physical body and cherish the interconnectedness of our humanity
  • Health… the vitality and vital force to do what you when, when you want, wherever you want, with whomever you want.

 

This is MY trip

While skyping with a friend, she asked me what was the best part of my trip so far. Without hesitation, I answer, “This is MY trip.”

 

 

I was instantly wrapped in an overwhelming sense of gratitude that my ex-boyfriend is ruining this trip for me, with their negativity, angst, scarcity and low energy. And that ripped open a gateway of how broken I used to be, how little self-esteem I had, how itty bitty self-worth I had, and how teeny tiny self-respect I had.

Emotional triggers and avalanches can strike so fast. The one thing I urge everyone to do if you want to be wealth and exquisitely free is to heighten your emotional intelligence, so that they triggers and avalanches don’t cost you your vitality (being around vampire people), your marriage (having to divorce vampire people), your business (having to fire vampire business partners or employees), or your life.

 

 

A quiet spot to #meditate. Whose dad dies suddenly during their 13-country around-the-world #exquisitefreedom tour?!? How have I co-created sooo many blessings, yet I seem to remember only the painful ones. Why hasn't daily gratitude journals since 1999, that's over 17,000 entries folks, not washed away all the pain and torment of 98 generations before me. When will I fully, fully, FULLY accept that my super high sensitivity, introversion, need for long, long, LONG periods of silence, need for lots of sleep, thirst for constant novelty, gender, skin colour, age, marital status, and parental conditioning (all of which are counter to business growth) as gifts... When will all the tests end?!? Never is the answer and why don't I like that answer?!? And the #daringgreatly and #risingstrong rumble continue. #somanyquestions #prayer #serenity

A photo posted by Ellany Lea (@wealthcoachtina) on

 

Skewed Definition of Marriage

A long time ago, I dated an alcoholic, with rage issues, who couldn't keep a job and couldn't afford an apartment, just because he said he loved me. What a broken fool I was, what a dysfunctional being I was. Thank God I’ve grown since then and have partnered up with some incredibly kind, loving, leading men.

All I can say is that I no longer blame myself or anyone else for being so broken. You see, this is what I was taught about marriage:

  • Marriage is the ultimate form of giving up… you couldn’t meet a partner on your own so you give up and have your family arrange something for you
  • You enter marriage just to shut the rest of the family up, to stop the “What?!? You’re 30 and not married, with no kids?!? You inadequate pathetic piece of worthlessness!” harassment
  • The women site around like a doormat until the men cheated, which is then grounds for divorce

Yeah. Great role models. Oh and did I mention that every single family member of my previous generation is divorced? Except for my parents. Though my siblings and I all wished that they had. But hey, I turned out ok... after tens upon tens upon tens upon tens of thousands of dollars in therapy, counseling, coaching, mentoring, and training.

 

 

I gift you a coconut filled with coconut ice cream and sticky rice. #nomnom #girlgi #rtw2015 #exquisitefreedom

A photo posted by Ellany Lea (@wealthcoachtina) on

 

The Greatest Determinant of Inner and Outer Wealth

In short, it's your choice in life partner. A divorce can slash your net worth in half, easy. And more than that, a divoce can slash your confidence and sense of worthiness into itty bitty bits. Yes, you will recover. The human spirit is strong. But chose wisely. Very wisely.

What next?

  • Even if you know you can't change the past, what's the one wish you still have of how things could have been different?

Thank you for being a lone nut, a leader, and a friend! <3

With infinite grace, freedom on!

xo, Ella

Ellany LeaAUTHOR • Hi! I'm Ella, founder of Guide to Grace. I invite you to join us for an exquisite freedom at the intersection of: entrepreneurship, enlightenment, and enchantment.