Turns out there aren’t 25 different types of fear. There is one root fear, which wears 25 different masks. If you could unmask each one, could you become fearless, as in less afraid? If you practiced fear dissolution, could you become fear-free? Let’s explore.
Leena creates product suites and marketing materials for the travel industry. She’s a free spirit and citizen of the world. She moved 11 timezones in pursuit of career opportunities, which came knocking from London to Singapore, from Dubai to Sydney. To her surprise...
It's natural to feel afraid. What you do about it will determine who you become.
Before a big change, every human experiences fear, whether it's real or not.
🌀 Always say yes and take on more than I can handle, stressing self to the max. 🌀 Hide or fall off the face of the earth when I start to notice that I can’t meet all my promises. 🌀 Chronically procrastinate, poor follow-through (eg. missed deadlines, late fees).
🌀 Extremely high expectations of self/others to be good, perfect, altruistic at all times. 🌀 Vacillate between extreme perfectionism and extreme rebellion/non-conformity. 🌀 Take on others’ poor behavior as my own fault, enabling them to avoid personal responsibility and accountability.
🌀 Give away my resources (time, energy, money, body, services, etc.) for free or for very little, as if they were disposable. 🌀 Chronically borrow against my own security and well being, thus perpetually feeling depleted, indebted and/or in survival mode. 🌀 Overstay miserable relationships and/or flee at the first sign of conflict.
🌀 Constantly misunderstood and told to calm down, be quiet and/or stop moving. 🌀 Others are intimidated / overwhelmed by the bigness of my ambition, energy, speed, creative pursuits, voice, etc. 🌀 Chronically repress my needs / desires, never asking for their fulfillment, fearing that they are “too much” for others.
🌀 Design my entire life inside chronic self-sufficiency and/or addictions (eg. workaholism), thus further isolating myself. 🌀 Contort self to be what others want, so to be loved, accepted and/or validated. 🌀 Overstay relationships that I’ve long outgrown because I can’t bear ending up alone and/or abandoning others.
🌀 Feel like the black sheep of the family, never really fitting in anywhere, and longing for true belonging. 🌀 Carry heavy false belief that life is lonely, unkind or not made for people like me. 🌀 Suffer from severe self-doubt and/or self-hatred due to lack of loving recognition, by self and/or others, of my unique gifts.
🌀 Suffer from hyper-vigilance, always waiting for the other shoe to drop. 🌀 Overly naïve and trusting, thus attracting narcissists, sociopaths and/or con artists. 🌀 Take a lot of uncalculated risks, living close to the edge, with few safety nets.